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Guilty Ghost

from 12​:​34 by Roderick

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lyrics

When we were just kids we filled the world with innocence.
Would trade in all of our sins for a bike with wheels that spin.
But now a few things have changed, my mind is never not feeling strange.
I fear I overcompensate because I hate this sick, sad, lonely fate.

Could I turn back?

I guess I'll never know and it shouldn't matter.
I've reached a new low - my guilty ghost is getting fatter.
I've been kidding myself, please understand.
Yeah, so much that I've done, I thought it'd make me a man,
I was wrong.

I'll admit that I've prayed that we would both be okay,
And I still believe in the ways you showed me how good life can be.
But now I stutter when I speak and wonder how I got this weak,
This has taken it's toll on me, now I'm gently drifting out to sea,

Would I turn back?

In the eyes of a God, my God.
I've been digging for far too long.
I've been humming this gravedigger's song.
Is it real? Am I really here?

All I want is the feeling of want but not for anyone,
Not just for anyone.

I'll never know and it doesn’t matter.
I've reached a new low - my guilty ghost is getting fatter.
I've been kidding myself, please understand.
Yeah, so much that I've done, I thought it'd make me a man,
I was wrong.

I was wrong, so wrong…

credits

from 12​:​34, released July 15, 2014
Engineered/Mixed/Mastered by Stephen Kellner (sksongs.bandcamp.com)

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Roderick New York, New York

Roderick is the nom-de-plume of singer-songwriter Stephen Kellner.
Songs about life from an honest perspective.

Lend me your ears and I'll sing you a song!

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